45 Comments
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Henny Hiemenz's avatar

My 12th grade English teacher would have a raging erection during and after reading this

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Robin Wilding's avatar

😆😆 That's definitely one of the funniest comments I've heard on any of my poems. Thanks Henry.

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Valerie Van Cleef's avatar

That was awesome! 👏🏼 👏🏼👏🏼. I want to use an exclamation point after that, but now I’m afraid.

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Robin Wilding's avatar

Don't worry, I had to google stuff to write this 😆. I have to google grammar and spelling an embarrassing amount for a professional writer.

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Sean McCoy Writes's avatar

Oh, talk wordy to me ;)

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Robin Wilding's avatar

😆😆

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Maryellen Ackroyd's avatar

This was incredible! You’re a poet, don’t know it! Your feet show it….they’re Longfellow’s. 😂😂😂

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Robin Wilding's avatar

😆😆 If there was a poetry snaps emoji I'd use it.

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Lisa Bolin 🌸's avatar

Punctuation: saving lives…

Let’s eat Grandma

Let’s eat, Grandma

😜

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Robin Wilding's avatar

Indeed it does. Let's eat Grandma?

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Lisa Bolin 🌸's avatar

She’s a tough old bird… 🤪

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David Shaw's avatar

I’ve got a book ready for a publisher … no takers … all about grammar and a full explanation of things like when and where to use all forms of punctuation. Problem is grammar is no longer aught in schools (as it should be).

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Robin Wilding's avatar

If you think grammar is bad now, wait until our skills atrophy due to AI.

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Sheila (of Ephemera)'s avatar

I love this...but your poem is mostly one big run-on sentence! Ahh! [insert image of brain 'sploding].

I did a full year of English grammar - including punctuation - as part of my Linguistics degree. For a really deep dive, The Transitive Vampire is an entertaining book. Mostly I just look at the pictures now, as much of what I learned 25 years ago has faded away...

Brilliant, as always!

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Robin Wilding's avatar

Yup, I love me a giant run-on sentence. 😆

You have a linguistics degree? Damn. I'mma just run away now haha.

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Joseph Schaumberg's avatar

Thanks for the mechanics grammar lesson.

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Robin Wilding's avatar

Glad you liked it :)

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Christopher Manson's avatar

Thanks.

I think my head exploded a little.

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Robin Wilding's avatar

😆 Sounds about right. My brain is still mush from writing it.

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Sara's avatar

Just popping in to say I’m thrilled you use the em dash with spaces either side as this is my preferred format. No need to jam it all together, bro!

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Sara's avatar

Also, here Down Under 🇦🇺 , we don’t vibe with the Oxford Comma. No need.

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Robin Wilding's avatar

Shhh...you'll start a nerdy fight here in the comments 😆😆

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Sallyfemina's avatar

What, no interrobang‽

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Robin Wilding's avatar

I ran out of digital space.

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Liza Blue's avatar

My friend have you heard of Standard Written English

That saves obedient grammarians from flailing gibberish

And bumbling eejits from educated American brains

Rumpty, plonkers, berks, prats and thickos are equally inane

Alas, many a story or poem SWE has parsed and wrecked

Long live Shakespeare and his vibrant, expressive and bawdy dialect

Tried to add Brit expressions, not sure if they are shared by our neighbors to the north. What rhyming dictionary do you use - if not the ones online, I highly recommend Willary Espy's "Words to Rhyme With." The lists are interspersed with Espy's creative and witty light verse. It has been my companion for decades.

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Robin Wilding's avatar

😆😆 That was sensational Liza!!

Ooh that sounds really interesting! My brain tried to think of a fancy lie to answer your question with. It came up blank. I just google "what rhymes with ___".

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Kristi Keller 🇨🇦's avatar

Dude...I can't believe you forgot the Interrobang!?

Google it!? 😂

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Robin Wilding's avatar

😆😆 I saw that before, in a piece I started on the most obscure punctuation. I never finished it. Hmm...perhaps I should dust it off.

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Kristi Keller 🇨🇦's avatar

I saw it in a documentary if you can believe that lol

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Linda Blatnik's avatar

Your poem was...brilliant.

Sometimes I forget to

capitalize, but punctuation

rules. As Jason says, this is a rap.

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Robin Wilding's avatar

"As Jason says, this is a rap" excellent ending Linda 😆😆

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Jennie O'Connor's avatar

This is extraordinary!

"Apostrophe’s use can be a little obsessive

it’s not their fault that they’re so possessive . . ."

I bow to your wordsmithing. I also flatly refuse to use the Oxford comma. Have you heard this song? https://open.spotify.com/track/0ful4PHfTIxzXiZSZsXQ0H?si=c93ef73284de4c2f

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Robin Wilding's avatar

Thanks Jennie!

Omg that song 😆😆😆😆. That's going to be stuck in my head forever. And give me about an hour to spread it around my discord full of writers so that I can pay this curse forward.

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Jennie O'Connor's avatar

Hahaha oh NOOOOOOO! I like it! I didn't mean to create a hellish earworm. Pass on the curse FAST!! 🏃🏻‍♀️

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Kay-El's avatar

Props for using “chutzpah” in a poem. I appreciate punctuation, more so after having to read The Sound and the Fury three times in various English classes. Reading the stream of consciousness portion of the book made me a hater of that style.

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Robin Wilding's avatar

I use chutzpah every chance I get! It took me too long to learn how to spell not to use it 😆

Ooh Faulkner--he's a TOUGH read. I do love him, but I know what you mean.

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Kay-El's avatar

I found I preferred his short stories over the novels.

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