While I still feel that introvert is the category that best suits me, so much of this resonates.
Though I don’t think social situations have ever really recharged my battery, I have a fairly decent ability to read the room. If I’m not already overwhelmed I can typically assimilate. That said, after an hour or two, I’m burned out, exhausted, tongue-tied and begin to crave the quiet in order to recharge. If the crowd is a particularly rowdy bunch, I feel this way sooner.
For years, I worked as a bank teller and I was pretty good at making small talk for those five minute interactions. I likely appeared social to our customers. The women I worked with were probably confused by this because I was significantly less talkative around them. For one reason, standing around the same five people for eight hours a day required more conversational skills than I possessed. For another reason, co-workers often seemed to fill the time with gossip about our customers and other coworkers who weren’t present which bothered me immensely and would make me clam up. One lady nicknamed me “Church Mouse” because I was so quiet. Around the right people, however, it’s much easier for me to be talkative.
That's so interesting about the time intervals you mentioned, I hadn't thought of it like that before, but I think a lot of us might operate in that way too. Except for the extroverts....weirdos 😆
You think that once people get to a certain age, they grow out of that BS... But I’ve definitely worked with women my age and older that seem to think they're the high school Heathers lol
Interesting, I had similar experiences when I worked at the public coalface. Breaks in the staffroom were often a combination of apathy, boredom, anxiety, depression & despair at having to listen to various shades of bitchy, back biting platitudes, sometimes from managers/bosses. Oh! The nail staring medium 😱
I consider myself an ambivert. However, my version of it differs from yours. I treasure my solitude, I can go weeks without interacting with people in person and not miss it at all. In certain social situations I can be extroverted and just chat up everyone in the room. When I get home, and am no longer being social, my batteries are drained and I need a long time to recharge my batteries.
I am Autistic, so that probably skews things as well. Small talk is like slow death to me. I would rather eat broken glass.
Actually that sounds a lot like me too. I take a while to recharge, although I'm not autistic. I'm with you on the small talk. It is the work of the devil, and I wish society would get rid of it 😆😆
I am so with you this! I call myself an introvert but get really freaking annoyed if someone mistakenly assumes that means I’m shy. I am so not shy. I will talk to strangers, even extremely socially awkward men someone assumed I would hit it off with for a blind date. So I’m definitely liking the ambivert label…but maybe I’m really an Omni??
I labeled myself as a shapeshifting empath with a dose of social anxiety. I mold myself to fit into a situation depending on the vibes I get. Turns out it’s ADHD and mad masking abilities. I’m a fabulous actor until I have anxiety about what’s happening.😝😂
For years I kept telling people that I'm an 'extroverted introvert'. Then I found the term ambivert and my entire idea of myself suddenly had so much clarity! This was one label I was willing to use because it finally explained to people why I can be so outgoing in one situation and then hermit myself away for an undisclosed amount of time in an undisclosed cave somewhere in Siberia.
I’ve used the terms extroverted-introvert and introverted-extrovert about myself, but neither felt exactly right. Glad to be able to land on ambivert and not have the ambiguity! I used to be a full on extrovert, but as I age, the introverted side began to gain strength.
Fair. Although how many of us are truly comfortable out there in the wild peopling? I just kinda assumed we were all faking our way through interactions trying to be normal.
Oh, I so agree with this and recognize myself within reading it. I would call myself from here on out empathic ambivert, for I too (feel) a room when entering. 😊
Solidly an introvert, confirmed by multiple Meyers-Briggs scores. Great anxiety in wading into a cocktail party where I know few people, don't know how to break into a conversation, but easily recognize when I have been excused from one. Try to get a few topics lined up beforehand to start a lively conversation. Recently been listening to a lot of Beatles music, so would like to ask, "What is your favorite Beatles song?"
It's great that you know that, and can plan things out that way! Although I think having questions at the ready is fairly common amongst many of us. It's probably why we so often ask 'what do you do', or 'how do you know so-and-so'...it's just conversation fodder to get by on.
I agree with your choice of the entire album, not that you need to head to the punch bowl. But if you go, I’ll come with so we can chat about the most perfect album in history.
Good choice - now you see this is a conversation I could sustain for the evening. I would agree with Day in the Life but counter with A Hard Day's Night and the mysterious first chord that opens the song, and then segue into the Beatles "story" songs, such as "Rocky Racoon," Lovely Rita," She's Leaving Home," etc, etc. Have considered these story songs as possible writing prompts for short stories.
Here, here! I'm a textbook Ambi! I did the world's most social career for over a decade as a total introvert. I switched that shit on and off like it was a lightbulb.
I can absolutely be the center of any room, comfortably but when I'm done? I'm ALL the way back into my padded, quiet room 🤣
I was all extrovert in my past, but now at 65, I am an ambivert, I could’ve be an omnivert once upon a time. I’m all good with ambivert. You are not alone.
This is so interesting!
While I still feel that introvert is the category that best suits me, so much of this resonates.
Though I don’t think social situations have ever really recharged my battery, I have a fairly decent ability to read the room. If I’m not already overwhelmed I can typically assimilate. That said, after an hour or two, I’m burned out, exhausted, tongue-tied and begin to crave the quiet in order to recharge. If the crowd is a particularly rowdy bunch, I feel this way sooner.
For years, I worked as a bank teller and I was pretty good at making small talk for those five minute interactions. I likely appeared social to our customers. The women I worked with were probably confused by this because I was significantly less talkative around them. For one reason, standing around the same five people for eight hours a day required more conversational skills than I possessed. For another reason, co-workers often seemed to fill the time with gossip about our customers and other coworkers who weren’t present which bothered me immensely and would make me clam up. One lady nicknamed me “Church Mouse” because I was so quiet. Around the right people, however, it’s much easier for me to be talkative.
That's so interesting about the time intervals you mentioned, I hadn't thought of it like that before, but I think a lot of us might operate in that way too. Except for the extroverts....weirdos 😆
Haha… right?! 😆
You think that once people get to a certain age, they grow out of that BS... But I’ve definitely worked with women my age and older that seem to think they're the high school Heathers lol
And men 🫣😄
Interesting, I had similar experiences when I worked at the public coalface. Breaks in the staffroom were often a combination of apathy, boredom, anxiety, depression & despair at having to listen to various shades of bitchy, back biting platitudes, sometimes from managers/bosses. Oh! The nail staring medium 😱
I consider myself an ambivert. However, my version of it differs from yours. I treasure my solitude, I can go weeks without interacting with people in person and not miss it at all. In certain social situations I can be extroverted and just chat up everyone in the room. When I get home, and am no longer being social, my batteries are drained and I need a long time to recharge my batteries.
I am Autistic, so that probably skews things as well. Small talk is like slow death to me. I would rather eat broken glass.
Actually that sounds a lot like me too. I take a while to recharge, although I'm not autistic. I'm with you on the small talk. It is the work of the devil, and I wish society would get rid of it 😆😆
I am so with you this! I call myself an introvert but get really freaking annoyed if someone mistakenly assumes that means I’m shy. I am so not shy. I will talk to strangers, even extremely socially awkward men someone assumed I would hit it off with for a blind date. So I’m definitely liking the ambivert label…but maybe I’m really an Omni??
I'm glad it resonated! I think a lot of us use or get labeled introvert when we aren't fully. But yeah, ambi vs omni is a little more difficult.
Ambivert. I like that.
I don't like being around people, but every time I have to go to some get-together, I always enjoy it a little and am glad afterward.
I'm also a bit of a narcissist, so I'm going to just tuck that label away and go with this ambivert label from now on and henceforth.
Thanks for that, I feel a tad less awkward & obnoxious now. : )
Glad I could help! Isn't that the way, enjoy it a little, and glad we went, but then also lets go home lol.
That's exactly right : )
I think I'm an extrovert, but I have a short time limit. I don't last long, my wife agrees.
😆😆😆 Well played Peter.
Nice use of the outside
influence in the extrovert
definition.
I labeled myself as a shapeshifting empath with a dose of social anxiety. I mold myself to fit into a situation depending on the vibes I get. Turns out it’s ADHD and mad masking abilities. I’m a fabulous actor until I have anxiety about what’s happening.😝😂
Well, it sounds like it took you a while to figure that out, but I'm glad you did!
Me too, but didn’t discover I had ADHD until I was in my 60s!
I was diagnosed @57🙄
For years I kept telling people that I'm an 'extroverted introvert'. Then I found the term ambivert and my entire idea of myself suddenly had so much clarity! This was one label I was willing to use because it finally explained to people why I can be so outgoing in one situation and then hermit myself away for an undisclosed amount of time in an undisclosed cave somewhere in Siberia.
I'm so glad it works for you! I think it's a great term that makes things less black and white. Lol at the undisclosed cave in Siberia 😆
I’ve used the terms extroverted-introvert and introverted-extrovert about myself, but neither felt exactly right. Glad to be able to land on ambivert and not have the ambiguity! I used to be a full on extrovert, but as I age, the introverted side began to gain strength.
100%, neither term can feel exactly right for ambiverts!
I’m simply overt.
😆😆
I don't know if I'd go so far as to say that I'm an ambivert.
I've been often described myself as an introvert who can fake it when necessary — but it's never really comfortable when I do.
I find that I'm best one on one with someone I'm comfortable with, or in a very small dinner party, say me and three other people.
Fair. Although how many of us are truly comfortable out there in the wild peopling? I just kinda assumed we were all faking our way through interactions trying to be normal.
Oh, I so agree with this and recognize myself within reading it. I would call myself from here on out empathic ambivert, for I too (feel) a room when entering. 😊
Solidly an introvert, confirmed by multiple Meyers-Briggs scores. Great anxiety in wading into a cocktail party where I know few people, don't know how to break into a conversation, but easily recognize when I have been excused from one. Try to get a few topics lined up beforehand to start a lively conversation. Recently been listening to a lot of Beatles music, so would like to ask, "What is your favorite Beatles song?"
It's great that you know that, and can plan things out that way! Although I think having questions at the ready is fairly common amongst many of us. It's probably why we so often ask 'what do you do', or 'how do you know so-and-so'...it's just conversation fodder to get by on.
Am I allowed to say "all of Sgt. Pepper"?
Probably not, I'll go back to the punch bowl.
I agree with your choice of the entire album, not that you need to head to the punch bowl. But if you go, I’ll come with so we can chat about the most perfect album in history.
I agree one thousand percent!
Probably A Day in the Life
Good choice - now you see this is a conversation I could sustain for the evening. I would agree with Day in the Life but counter with A Hard Day's Night and the mysterious first chord that opens the song, and then segue into the Beatles "story" songs, such as "Rocky Racoon," Lovely Rita," She's Leaving Home," etc, etc. Have considered these story songs as possible writing prompts for short stories.
https://lizabluehumorist.substack.com/p/writing-prompts-from-beatles-lyrics
Who doesn't love Rocky Raccoon or the ethereal beauty of Paul McCartney's voice on Black Bird, or the punk rock angst of Helter Skelter or, or, or...
Ambi here!
Yay! I knew us ambi's would find each other here
Here, here! I'm a textbook Ambi! I did the world's most social career for over a decade as a total introvert. I switched that shit on and off like it was a lightbulb.
I can absolutely be the center of any room, comfortably but when I'm done? I'm ALL the way back into my padded, quiet room 🤣
😆😆 That padded room sounds lovely, can I come too?
I am with you! This fits me perfectly. Thanks for putting it out there!
I was all extrovert in my past, but now at 65, I am an ambivert, I could’ve be an omnivert once upon a time. I’m all good with ambivert. You are not alone.
It me!